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HOLY HUMOR During these serious and troubled times, people of
 all faiths should remember these four great
 religious truths:
 
 1. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's Chosen
 People.
 2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
 3.Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the
 leader of the Christian world.
 4.  Mormons do not recognize each other at the
 liquor store.
 
 GOOD SAMARITAN
 A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the
 story of the Good Samaritan.
 She asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on
 the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would
 you do?" A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed
 silence, "I think I'd throw up.."
 
 DID NOAH FISH?
 A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you
 think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the
 Ark ?" "No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with
 just two worms."
 
 THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
 A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young
 class memorize one of the most quoted passages in
 the Bible - Psalm 23 . She gave the youngsters a
 month to learn the chapter. Little Rick was
 excited about the task - but he just couldn't
 remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could
 barely get past the first line. On the day that
 the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in
 front of the congregation, Ricky was so nervous.
 When it was his turn, he stepped up to the
 microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my
 Shepherd, and that's all I need to know."
 
UNANSWERED PRAYER
 The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that
 her father always paused and bowed his head for a
 moment before starting his sermon. One day, she
 asked him why. "Well, Honey," he began, proud that
 his daughter was so observant of his messages.
 "I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a good
 sermon." "How come He doesn't answer it?" she
 asked.

 BEING THANKFUL
 A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, "So
 your mother says your prayers for you each night?
 That's very commendable. What does she say?" The
 little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"
  
ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS
 When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers,
 she would bless every family member, every friend,
 and every animal (current and past).. For several
 weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer,
 Kelli would say, "And all girls." This soon became
 part of her nightly routine, to include this
 closing. My curiosity got the best of me and I
 asked her, "Kelli, why do you always add the part
 about all girls?" Her response, "Because everybody
 always finish their prayers by saying 'All Men'!"
 
 SAY A PRAYER
 Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday
 dinner at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was
 seated around the table as the food was being
 served. When Little Johnny received his plate, he
 started eating right away. "Johnny! Please wait
 until we say our prayer." said his mother. "I
 don't need to," the boy replied. "Of course, you
 do "his mother insisted. "We always say a prayer
 before eating at our house." "That's at our
 house." Johnny explained. "But this is Grandma's
 house and she knows how to cook.

  THE BIBLE
 Did you know that... When you carry the Bible,
 Satan has a headache. When you open it, he
 collapses. When he sees you reading it, he faints.
 Let's read the Bible every day so he keeps on
 fainting. Maybe one day he'll have a stroke and
 never wake up.

 And did you also know that when you are about to
 forward this email to others, The devil will
 discourage you but forward it anyway.

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