MIRROR, MIRROR, on the wall! What do you see?
One of the problems with abuse is that many people fail to identify their own personal character traits. Whether they ignore them, deny them, or are just plain narcissistic where they think that they are perfect and everyone else is to blame for everything, the end result is basically the same.
The abusers exhibit these negative characteristics at the expense of their victims, with varying degrees of severity. If we all look at a mirror and look at a true reflection of ourselves, what do we see? Do we see positive traits or do we see negative traits? Do we see a mixture? What do our families and friends see when they relate to us? If what we see and what our families and friends see are different, that should be a BIG RED FLAG that there is a problem!! When we truthfully evaluate ourselves, this should be a simple test to just circle the traits that correspond to your own personality…
These are some abusive and non-abusive characteristics or character traits:
A= Angry/ Abrasive/ Antagonistic/ Attacking/ A-straying
B= Bad/ Belittling/ badgering/ Blaming/ Boastful/ Bigotry/ Bully
U= Unkind/ Unhappy/ Un-Godly/ Using/ Unrelenting/ Unrealistic/ Unsatisfied/ Unreliable/ Unfaithful
S= Scolding/ Slanderous/ Sarcastic/ Selfish/ Scaring/ Stinging/ Slick/ Shifty
I= Injustice/ Inconsiderate/ Inequality/ Indecent/ Infidelity/ Intolerant/ injurious/ Insulting/ Immoral/ Irritable
V= Violent/ vindictive/ Villain/ Violating/ Venomous/ Vengeful
E= Egotistical/ Exploitation/ Evil/ Explosive/ Endangering/ Erratic/ exalting of self
N= Nice/ Normal/ Nourishing/ Non-boastful/ Non-oppositional
O= Open/ Overlooking/ Obliging/ Obedient
N= Non-fault finding/ Never negative/ Non-demanding/ Non-oppressive
A= Affirming/ Adoring/ Accepting/ Admiring/ Appreciative/ Assisting/ Appropriate/ Authentic/ Accountable
B= Believing/ Benevolence/ Blessing/ Beneficial/ Blameless behavior
U= Understanding/ Uplifting/ Unselfish/ ultra-caring/ Urging/ Unimpeachable/ Upright
S= Sincere/ Sensitive/ Sacrificial/ Spiritual/ sympathetic/ Supportive/ Sinless/ Saintly
I= Impartial/ Integrity/ Infallible/ Innocence/ Ideal/ Insightful/ Impeccable
V= Virtuous/ Vested
E= Esteeming/ Encouraging/ Ethical/ Empathic/ exalting of others/ Easygoing
No matter what characteristics that we identify within ourselves or our family identifies, as we seek the Lord and ask Him to help us, to heal us, and to purify us, I know that God will answer those prayers. One thing that I have learned through all of my experiences as a victim of abuse, is that even the abusers were once victims… In most cases, they learned by the abusive behaviors of their parents and others toward them.
My prayer is that all victims of abuse and all abusers will be healed and delivered of their past and they will step into their future as they walk with Christ who is the Healer and Deliverer…in Jesus’ name… Amen.
by Secret Angel of Secret Angel Ministry and The Abuse Expose’ with Secret Angel