“For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing…. Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. Romans 7:18
This morning I’ve spent some quiet time praying. There are things in my life that are frustrating me greatly. I am finding that when I see wrongs being done around me that my intuition is to manhandle it and control it in personal strength (in my flesh or my will).
Like many, I am a “fixer.” I am task-oriented and driven to identify the problem, determine the resolution and implement the fix. I have always been like this and though it’s a good characteristic when it comes to business, it is not necessarily the way to go when it comes to personal challenges or conflicts. I may want to “do good” in the spirit but it is so easy for the “flesh” to contradict that.
What I am learning through many seasons in my life is if I approach some of the life challenges, the real personal heart pains in my own strength, then I leave no room for God. What is His will in it?
The Bible gives us many examples of human will vs. God’s will and the Apostle Paul’s struggle with the same thing sums it up nicely. What we want to do in the flesh is not necessary what we’re supposed to do in spirit.
I can think of another example of this in the Bible when the night before Jesus’ crucifixion He prayed in the garden of Gethsemane… He was in a great deal of pain – physically, spiritually and emotional. As you read the scripture, it is apparent that in His humanity he was weak and afraid of what was about to come, “Father take this cup of wrath from me…” but in the Spirit, Jesus prayed “but not my will but thy will be done…” (Luke 22).
I am not comparing my personal challenges to be anything close to what our Savior suffered, I am just saying it is His example to bring it to God and ask for help and, here is the hard part – acquiesce to God’s will in the resolution of our mess.
How many times have I told someone else to “let go and let God?”
Sometimes I need to heed myself “preach it girl mentality” and remember that answers are not found horizontally but vertically- that God’s Will will be done.
So though my prayers started this morning with a lot of questions in my heart, “fixer” processes in my head and confusion in my spirit, I’m pretty clear now what direction to go…What will I do in the midst of this trouble?
God’s WILL will make a way. He’s got this – now I just need to let go and let God. 😇
Amen and amen.